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Why mixed emotions are normal: Navigating love, sadness and relief

Grief, love, sadness, and relief – these are powerful human emotions. But when they all show up at once, it can feel confusing, even unsettling. At MAID Family Support Society, we want to reassure you that mixed emotions are not only normal, they’re a natural part of the human experience.

Whether you’re supporting a loved one choosing MAID, grieving a loss, or reflecting on a major life change, understanding the complexity of your feelings can help bring clarity, compassion, and healing.

What are mixed emotions?

Mixed emotions are when you feel two or more conflicting feelings at the same time. For example:

  • Loving someone deeply, yet feeling sadness when their pain ends
  • Feeling relief after a difficult caregiving journey, intertwined with guilt
  • Experiencing gratitude and grief simultaneously

These emotional blends can feel surprising or even uncomfortable, but they’re completely human. Life rarely gives us simple emotional patterns, especially around death, caregiving, or major transitions.

Why mixed emotions are normal

1. We’re multifaceted beings
Humans are emotional mosaics. We don’t feel just one thing at a time. Our brains process multiple experiences — past, present, and anticipated future — all at once. When life events are meaningful, intense, or complex, our emotional responses often reflect that.

2. Love and sadness are not opposites
Love endures beyond events, even in loss. You can feel deep love and connection while feeling heartbreak and sadness at the same time. These emotions don’t cancel each other out; they coexist.

3. Relief isn’t the same as lack of love
Many people feel relief after a prolonged period of stress, caregiving, or suffering. Relief doesn’t mean you didn’t love the person; it means your nervous system is finally able to rest. It’s a very normal response to long-term emotional or physical exhaustion.

Common mixed emotional experiences after loss

Here are feelings many people experience, sometimes all at once:

  • Love for the person and gratitude for shared moments
  • Sadness from missing them or from the impact of loss
  • Relief when suffering has ended or a difficult chapter is over
  • Guilt for feeling relief or joy
  • Anger over circumstances, timing, or what wasn’t said

These emotional combinations are not signs of being weak or cold. They’re signs of being human.

Why we might feel guilt around relief

Feeling relief, especially after caregiving, chronic illness, or deep loss, can trigger guilt. You might think:

  • “Shouldn’t I feel only sadness?”
  • “Does relief mean I didn’t care enough?”
  • “Why am I laughing at a memory when they’re gone?”

These questions are common. Relief is your nervous system recovering. It doesn’t erase love or honour. It’s part of your emotional processing.

How to navigate mixed emotions with compassion

Instead of judging your feelings, try these approaches:

1. Name what you’re feeling
Say it out loud or write it down:

  • “I feel sad, but also relieved.”
  • “I miss them, but I’m grateful for our time.”

Naming feelings reduces shame and confusion.

2. Give yourself permission
There’s no right way to feel. Be as gentle with yourself as you would be with a loved one.

3. Share with someone you trust
Talking with a friend, support group, or counsellor helps you make sense of emotions that might feel overwhelming when held alone.

4. Accept contradictions
Mixed emotions aren’t mistakes, they’re normal. Accepting them leads to growth, not guilt.

How MAID Family Support Society helps you navigate emotions

At MAID Family Support Society, we understand how layered and intense emotions can be, especially when you’re walking through loss, caregiving, or life transitions related to a loved one’s choice to pursue MAID.

We offer:

  • Peer support for family members and loved ones
  • A sense of community with others who have been there and where emotions are validated, not judged

You don’t have to make sense of everything all at once. Healing doesn’t mean feeling one emotion at a time. It means honouring all the emotions you’re carrying.

Final thoughts

Mixed emotions are not a problem to fix. They’re part of what makes us human. Feeling love, sadness, and relief at the same time doesn’t make you ungrateful, unloving, or confused. It means you’re processing life, and that’s a brave, meaningful journey.

If you’re struggling with mixed emotions and want support, please explore our programs or reach out. You deserve understanding, compassion, and care.

 

Photo by Alexas Fotos on Unsplash

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