How to talk About MAID with family and friends: Tips for handling tough conversations, disagreements, and misunderstandings
Talking about medical assistance in dying (MAID) is never easy. Whether you’re considering MAID for yourself, supporting a loved one through the process, or simply trying to understand someone’s choice, these conversations can be emotional, polarizing, and deeply personal.
At MAID Family Support Society, we understand how important it is to communicate with empathy and clarity. Here are practical tips for having thoughtful, respectful, and compassionate conversations about MAID with family and friends.
1. Start with compassion and curiosity
Approach every conversation with empathy. Remember that MAID can trigger fear, grief, confusion, or moral conflict in others. Instead of jumping into explanations or defences, begin by listening and asking questions like:
“How much do you know about MAID?”
“What are your feelings about end-of-life choices?”
“Can I share what this process has meant for me (or our loved one)?”
Genuine curiosity helps defuse tension and shows respect for the other person’s perspective.
2. Be informed before you talk
Having accurate, up-to-date information about MAID in Canada can help you feel more confident and grounded during difficult conversations. Familiarize yourself with:
– The legal criteria and eligibility for MAID
– The difference between MAID and palliative care
– The step-by-step process, including safeguards and waiting periods
You don’t need to be an expert—but understanding the basics can clear up common misconceptions and reduce fear.
3. Respect different beliefs and boundaries
MAID is an ethical and emotional issue that touches on personal values, religion, and culture. It’s okay if not everyone agrees.
If someone strongly opposes MAID:
– Avoid debating or trying to win them over
– Acknowledge their right to their beliefs
– Focus on what you need from the conversation: understanding, space, or simply being heard
Sometimes the goal isn’t agreement; it’s mutual respect.
4. Use I statements to express your feelings
When sharing your own experience or decision about MAID, use “I” statements to stay grounded in your truth:
“I feel peace knowing this is an option.”
“I struggled with this decision at first too.”
“I want you to know how much I value your support, even if we don’t see eye to eye.”
This helps minimize defensiveness and keeps the conversation personal and heartfelt.
5. Set boundaries if needed
Not every conversation will go smoothly. It’s okay to pause or walk away if things become heated or hurtful. You can say:
“This is really emotional for me—can we revisit this later?”
“I understand this is hard to talk about. Let’s give each other some space.”
Protecting your emotional wellbeing is just as important as being available for dialogue.
6. Offer resources for support and education
Some people may need time and space to learn on their own. Offer them access to compassionate, non-judgmental resources like:
– MAID Family Support Society
– Dying With Dignity Canada
– Canadian Virtual Hospice
Giving loved ones the opportunity to read, reflect, and process at their own pace can make future conversations more open and productive.
7. Lean on peer support
You don’t have to navigate these conversations alone. If you’re struggling to find the right words or feel overwhelmed by others’ reactions, reach out to a support group or peer support volunteer. At MAID Family Support Society, we offer one-to-one peer support from people who’ve been in your shoes.
These connections can provide insight, emotional validation, and practical advice for managing difficult conversations.
Final thoughts
Talking about MAID isn’t just a medical conversation—it’s a human one. It’s about values, dignity, fear, love, and connection. These discussions may be challenging, but they also offer an opportunity to grow closer, deepen understanding, and support one another through life’s hardest moments.
If you’re looking for support or someone to talk to, reach out to us. You’re not alone.
